Saturday, October 7, 2017

North Georgia Houseboat Cruise Vacations

OK. This client does not exist but we really think they should.

There are houseboat cruise vacations all over the world. We should know because our global corporate HQ houseboat just sank.

Our sinking a houseboat does not make us an expert on worldwide houseboat cruise vacations. Google makes us an expert on worldwide houseboat cruise vacations.

Our sunken HQ houseboat is currently entirely unsuitable for a vacation but it's what got us thinking. Not thinking clearly but thinking.

You too can use Google to become an expert on worldwide houseboat cruise vacations. But you haven't done it yet & we have so that makes us your expert on worldwide houseboat cruise vacations.

This boat looks significantly more vacation suitable than ours at least for the time being.

This company does international houseboat vacations. We link to them only because they are continents away & probably speak some foreign language. They are therefore somewhat less likely to sue us.

There is no reason someone can't do here what foreigners do there. And since we are Americans & specifically since we are Georgians we could do it better.

That shirt happens to be very foreign Georgians who think they do it better but it's the only image we could find. When we talk about Georgians doing it better think of a houseboat vacation like it was a resort hotel. In case you have never been to a resort hotel it goes something like this.

There are plenty of American houseboat opportunities also. But let's focus on north Georgia. There are houseboat rentals on north Georgia lakes but not houseboat vacations. So let's focus on where there are neither houseboat rentals or vacations. North Georgia rivers.

North Georgia rivers are where we will focus. Portions of some are navigable by houseboat we think but are not sure. But we know more than you unless you just went & spent more time on Google than us.

Let’s discuss briefly the difference between the terms "vacation" & "rental". Vacation is when you relax, are pampered & have a care free experience. Rental is when you pretend like you know what you're doing, your boat sinks on the 1st day & everyone involved hates you.

Let's talk about houseboats. They are houses that float. Most of the time. Hopefully. Especially if you vacation on one & don't rent one. And especially if you are not Stoddard Media Global HQ.

Houseboats are most excellent for a vacation. Certainly more excellent than an RV. On a houseboat you travel beautiful waterways that have no lanes to the destination of your choice. On an RV you travel on gridlocked asphalt to where you are packed in like sardines at places named Jellystone.

This is definitely not north Georgia but you definitely can't get there by RV & it's definitely not a place called Jellystone.

Let's talk about the houseboat vacation experience. We have in mind a relaxing experience where someone else does the navigating & will not sink the boat like you would. He or she might wear a hat like this but probably otherwise dressed up a little better.

We're talking meals prepared by chefs & served by either the chef or a better dressed captain. All you do is relax & promise to stay out of the way. If you relax & stay out of the way successfully other people probably even remove & wash the dishes.

Now let's talk about north Georgia & houseboats. Very cool houseboats were once made in north Georgia very near where we're talking about you taking vacation. They were made there until they stopped making them there. But some very cool ones still exist & could be made available for purposes of this article that may otherwise not seem to have a purpose.

Now let's talk about the things you could do on your north Georgia houseboat vacation. If you have little imagination & didn't understand words featured on that link the recreation options look like this.

But first since we need to stick another graphic in here so let's make it what the interior of a nicely maintained vintage houseboat looks like.

Now back to the list of north Georgia recreation options:

Hiking & Backpacking, Canoe, Kayak, Tubing, Mountain Biking, Waterfalls, Fishing, Hunting, Horseback Riding, Stargazing & Wildlife. Pardon that wording in the above list is not right & there are so many hyperlinks. We copied & pasted without correction because it's late & we're lazy. We excluded golf but someone could probably make it available if you really want to spoil a good walk.

As we said it's late & we're lazy so we'll wrap up shortly. But we think this sounds like a good idea & wonder if other people do too. Let's close with an image that reflects that pampered theme.

We're not certain the above service would be offered on a north Georgia houseboat vacation. But if you look like that the CEO of Stoddard Media would take the day or month off & travel by RV if necessary to wherever you are & perform that service without it costing you an extra dime.

We'll pick this up again when we've had some sleep.

But there's still space for another nice houseboat vacation image to tide you over until then.

I dedicate this to Sarah whose WiFi I borrowed to put finishing touches on the article. She claimed she would be among the first customers of such a venture as she is overdue for a pampered vacation.

For more information or to let us know if you agree this all sounds like a good idea contact:

Stoddard Media
1400 Market Place Blvd
Cumming GA 30041